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not liking facebook post fast enough

A dumpable offense in Motherwell...

Motherwell resident Matthew McNair is said to be slightly devastated after being dumped by his girlfriend Stacy as a result of him not liking a Facebook post quick enough.

The couples relationship, which lasted 6 months, 3 engagements and 12 breakups is said to have been ended after Stacey posted a selfie of her pouting with a neighbour's puppy she borrowed for the occasion. After the photo amassed 24 likes after 30 minutes and seeing that Matthew was not forthcoming with a like of his own Stacey called time on the relationship. Stacey proceeded to text McNair to let him know it "was over" before reminding him that he was "a wee bastard".

After the breakup Stacey joined 2 pretend friends in Starbucks for a coffee and 17 more selfies with ridiculous hash tags "lovinlife" and "bestbuds4life".  

McNair insists the breakup came as a surprise to him as he didn't even know she posted to his Facebook timeline. "She's forever posting shite on Facebook and Social Media, I didn't even see that post. If she spend less time taking selfies she could get a real job and change her job status to something other than 'being a full time mad bastard'."

When asked does he plan to reconcile with Stacy he says its probably over for the best. "Ach noh, sure the young lass I met last weekend isn't as annoying. bigger tits too, who doesn't like an upgrade?"

uk sattire news

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